Pumpkin Patch Piglet (w/ video)

O C E A N!

H I G H W A Y 1!

H A L F M O O N B A Y!

M fawning over seaside Pampas Grass like she's never seen it before in all her life. Watching surfers take to the waves at Moss Beach.

Lunch and window-shopping in Half Moon Bay. Gawking at the 1,535 lb. pumpkin that won the Safeway World Championship Pumpkin Weigh-Off this year. Antiques at our favorite spot. Finding gold-flecked vintage ski pants and an equestrian scarf for pennies. Picking up fancy unpasteurized Manchego cheese and Spanish Marcona almonds to nibble on with a fresh loaf of artisan French bread.

Hayrides, haunted houses and petting zoos at the pumpkin patches. Frolicking about at Montara Beach, where the waves offshore got so big and so tall that they'd briefly block out the horizon, and where it was so clean that not even the seagulls bothered with it. A giggly sunset at Rockaway Beach.

There is nothing like being towed around a pumpkin patch by your flannel-clad, big-ass-boot wearing, grinning tomboy, is there, femmes? It's one of those rare joys in life. M picked out 10 little tiny baby pumpkins, and each of us picked out one big one for carving at Halloween. The weather was perfect. A pinch too warm, in fact, but M remedied her woolly issues by taking a shard of glass off the floor of the antique shop yard and cutting off the sleeves of her shirt.

Do I need to say it?

I guess so.

H O T.

The teenage boys who were studying maths in between scaring the daylights out of total strangers asked us if we wanted it "really scary" or just "a little scary", and of course I trilled "EXTRA S U P E R SCARY!" and we all walked through the wooden doors into total darkness, clinging to M.

We counted to fifteen as directed, and blew out poor M's eardrums as we screamed our way through 1,000 square feet or so of perfectly hokey, old-fashioned haunted house horror.

In the petting zoo of RADNESS there were piglets, bunnies, lambs, goats, ducks, chickens, and of course, tiny human beings. One of the bunnies bit me three times. The llamas were off limits and the ponies too miniature for me to ride (though believe you me, I tried). I've never held a piglet before.

EVERYONE SHOULD HOLD A PIGLET.

It's amazing. Check out my awesome piglet-bunny-chicken video, filmed by M, by clicking here!

FEMME: Levi's skinny jeans, Full Tilt plaid shirt, vintage Gucci scarf, boots from Buffalo Exchange, vintage Dooney & Bourke All-Weather Leather bag.

TOMBOY: RSQ London jeans, Mossimo t-shirt, vintage Pendleton flannel shirt, Harley Davidson boots, leather cuff.

Said big-ass pumpkin, behind my head: